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   Home  > Health Club > Building closeness and intimacy > Articles

Seven steps to marital Ecstacy

By Joe Beam

Step Five—Identify and Implement Every Essential Positive Behavior

Analysis — Every person has certain emotional needs. When a person's most important emotional needs are met, he or she feels content, fulfilled, and happy. When a person's most important emotional needs aren’t met, he or she feels empty, lonely, unfulfilled, or frustrated. While every person bears responsibility to maturely meet his or her own needs, in wonderful marriages each also intentionally fulfills the most important emotional needs of the other. When each fulfills the other, they discover their own needs are more full met. To create a fulfilling marriage, each spouse first accurately analyzes him-or herself to discover just what those needs are and how he or she wishes them to be fulfilled.

Education — When people know their most important emotional needs, they must clearly communicate them to their spouses. Their spouse needs to know what the needs is and how it could best be fulfilled. As each learns the needs of the other, he or she educates self to adequately fulfill those needs.

Plan — Working together, the couple designs a plan to fulfill the most important emotional needs of the other. As the plan is implemented, each patiently and lovingly guides the other to success.

Step Four—Identify and Stop All Negative Behaviors Affecting the Relationship

Step Six—Develop Shared Spirituality in the Relationship


In this article
- Introduction
- Step One—Diminish Any Intense Negative Emotions
- Step Two—Create Communication That Exhibits Respect
- Step Three— Modify Each Spouse’s Beliefs or Perspectives to Positive Views About:
- Step Four—Identify and Stop All Negative Behaviors Affecting the Relationship
- Step Five—Identify and Implement Every Essential Positive Behavior
- Step Six—Develop Shared Spirituality in the Relationship
- Step Seven—Passionately Pursue Passion

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© 2000, Joe Beam. Used by permission.


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